Whether you’ve met someone new or have an existing relationship, you may be wondering- am I doing this right? Relationships, after all, take work, so if you’re asking yourself, how to be a better girlfriend, you are at least taking a step in trying to set a relationship up for success. Here’s are a few tips and advice on how to be a good girlfriend.
What Is a Girlfriend?
Before we dive into what makes the best girlfriend ever, let’s explore the meaning of the word. In today’s society, a girlfriend is often assumed to be a romantic partner, as well as a friend. The friendship part is just as important as the romantic part, so if you’re wondering how to be the best girlfriend, think about how to be a best friend as well.
Signs a Guy Has Never Had a Girlfriend
For some people, relationships do not become important until later in life. If your guy is nervous, overly clingy, or isn’t really doing the relationship thing quite right, it may be his first time. Don’t get discouraged by this! Instead, take it as an opportunity to establish good communication within the relationship.
While the “what are we” talk is awkward, it may also be necessary if you really aren’t sure where you stand. The good news about the conversation is that you’ll have an excuse to find out what your partner needs and wants in a relationship.
Most of us want to put our best foot forward while dating, which is completely understandable. However, you also want to let your partner know who you are and about your likes and dislikes because your partner is going to use that information during the relationship. For instance, if you told him that you’re an avid baseball fan because he likes baseball, you can’t fault him for surprising you with tickets for a game for your anniversary.
Stick to the Facts
Science says that men are more facts and problem-solving oriented, while women tend to be more emotional. This isn’t to say that your guy won’t need to vent to you after a long day, but don’t be surprised if he tries to come up with a solution after you tell him about a problem.
The same goes for general communication within the relationship. When in doubt, a direct, factual approach is always best. Even if you disagree on something, staying calm and factual promises a better outcome.
Society puts a lot of pressure on women to be ‘nice,’ which means it can be hard to voice your displeasure about something big or small. As a result, many women end up suppressing their anger or dislike for something until it literally explodes and turns into a fight. Instead, let your partner know that the specific behavior is irritating from the very beginning. If you tell him calmly, he’ll be more inclined to fix the behavior, and you won’t have to try to pretend it’s not bothering you.
Confidence is Key
This is true in most aspects of life, including relationships. Your partner’s job is to be there for you- not validate your entire existence. There’s nothing sexier than self-acceptance and self-love. Girlfriend or not, you’ll want to make sure that you are comfortable in your own skin.
There’s no such thing as the perfect girlfriend because not every human being has the exact same needs. Your partner may need someone to support their dreams and integrate into their family, or they may simply need someone to come home to at night. Doing your best is definitely enough, so stop obsessing over a mythical, impractical ideal.
Let Him Know He’s Appreciated
Everyone loves feeling appreciated, and your partner is no exception. Most guys hate making a girlfriend voice appreciation, so they usually just ignore the issue. But you shouldn’t. Letting the guy know that you appreciate his presence and his efforts will not only reinforce positive behavior but will make him feel loved.
Get to Know His Friends
Movies and television have long perpetuated a rivalry between a guy’s friends and his girlfriend or wife. This stereotype is not only ridiculous but also potentially harmful to your relationship. Instead of ignoring his friends take some time to get to know them. After all, your partner’s friends have been there for years, and they’ll probably be there for the rest of your relationships.
As the relationship gets more serious, the same advice is going to apply to his family.
Do Your Own Thing
In a new relationship, it may be tempting to spend as much time as possible with your partner. Don’t. Sure, you want to be the best girlfriend, but that doesn’t mean hanging out with your guy every single spare moment. Dropping your friends and your hobbies when you get into a relationship is not going to help you be better at the relationship. Since your partner has their own hobbies, they’ll probably find it odd that you always want to hang out together.
Keep Things Interesting
It’s easy for a relationship to become comfortable when two people have been dating for a while. However, if you both stop trying, you may quickly see things go downhill. Whether it’s your second date or your fiftieth, you’ll want to try and plan new and fun activities together. Of course, planning isn’t solely your responsibility, but you can definitely take turns.
Know When to Quit
If things aren’t working out, or if your family and friends are noticing red flags in the relationship, you’ll want to ask yourself- is it me as a girlfriend, or is it my partner? Leaving a relationship is tough. After all, you’ve already invested time and are probably emotionally attached.
However, you’re going to have to get tough with yourself for a minute. If your partner is abusive either physically or verbally, they don’t deserve you as a girlfriend. Doing it is hard, but it’s ultimately better for your overall safety and wellbeing.
Considering these tips will help make your relationship stronger; however, being a good girlfriend is more than just following tips and advice. While it is important to find way methods for self-improvement in a relationship, the best way to ensure you are being a good girlfriend is by finding someone who will appreciate you just the way you are, while both of you grow and learn together.